Bride Publicly 'Embarrassing' Mom-in-Law by Returning Wedding Money Praised

You can choose your wedding partner, but you can't choose their family. You may get lucky and your in-laws welcome you with open arms. Or you could spend years, maybe even a lifetime, feuding with your new relatives.

Money in particular seems to bring out the worst in people, as one woman discovered while planning her wedding. Sharing her story with Reddit's AmItheA****** forum on Monday, user u/TATiredofmyMIL said that her mother-in-law tried to "bully" her with money, even though the poster comes from a wealthy family.

She wrote: "Me (28F) and my fiancé (27M) are getting married in March. I come from an upper-class family and my fiancée is lower-middle-class (this is a delicate matter for his Family).

"Despite me being able to pay all the costs of the wedding, my parents gave the equivalent of 70% of the value of the wedding as a gift, which would be around (30K - fictitious value).

She continued: "When my fiance's parents learned that my parents had given this gift (my fiance and I didn't mention it, my SIL "snitched on" them), they decided to give their gift as well and gave 3K, an amount for which I was very grateful to have received."

However, the woman quickly regretted accepting the money, as her soon-to-be we

According to Charles Schwab's 2021 Modern Wealth Index, Americans believe that a personal net worth of $1.9 million is necessary to be considered "wealthy"—more than twice the net worth of the average household. To achieve "financial happiness," those surveyed said, a net worth of $1.1 million is needed, and to be comfortable, a household would need $624,000.

A 2016 study found that middle-class people are the most risk-averse when it comes to money, because of the fear of losing their socioeconomic position. Research by sociologist Karl Pillemar supports this, with conflict over money and inheritances a common cause of family estrangement. In a nationwide survey for his book Fault Lines: Fractured Families and How to Mend Them, 27 percent of U.S. adults had cut off contact with a family member, with many citing financial disputes as the cause.

Since accepting the money from her fiancé's family, the Reddit poster's future mother-in-law has been commenting on everything from the ceremony to the size of the party. She is particularly concerned about the color of TATiredofmyMIL's dress, which is lilac instead of the traditional white.

The poster wrote: "Over time, she gave up on imposing the idea of ​​a big party and not having a religious ceremony, but the dress is something she annoys me [about] too much.

"It continues even though I [snapped] on her or my fiance tells her to stop. Because of that, we are in [low contact] with her."

Despite attempts to avoid her fiance's mother, they were thrown together at her future sister-in-law's birthday party.

The poster said, "Not even 5 minutes after I stepped into the party, she started again with the idea of ​​me having to wear white because it's an important tradition.

"It got to the point where she was talking to her sisters about how this new generation doesn't respect traditions and that she was sorry/afraid of these new parties.

"I had my limit when she spoke loud and clear that in her time, the bride and groom respected their parents' opinions, even more so if they helped pay for the wedding.

"I was very angry and said 'Enough, I can't take it, it's not worth listening to other people's shit for this money.'"

The poster had $3,000 in her pocket, which she was planning to deposit at the bank later that day. Fed up with the mother's comments, she pulled the cash out and handed it to her in front of the attendees.

"I added that now she won't say anything, because she's not helping," she wrote. "This generated a confusion of tremendous proportions, my fiancé's entire family fighting on me, saying that I humiliated her in front of everyone and demeaned the amount they gave."

After the uproar, the couple left early to avoid further conflict.

Concluding her story, TATiredofmyMIL wrote: "My fiancé understands why I did it but said it wasn't my best moment and I could have done it in private and not in front of everyone."

Reddit users applauded the woman's actions, with her post receiving over 10,000 upvotes and more than 800 comments.

"She wanted to be a bully," said supergamernerd. "She thought she bought the rights to mistreat someone. She was wrong.

"She trash talked in public, she got told in the same public."

"Right???" agreed geekylace. "It's OP's wedding so she can wear what she wants."

LiveLovelyLala wrote: "'I'm paying for the wedding' card then you had every right to give the card back and take it off the table. She is the one that made it public, not you."

JBW66 commented: "Never understand the argument that people who start s*** in public should be given the consideration of dealing with them in private.

"[Mother-in-law] started it, you finished it, she'll think twice the next time."

Newsweek reached out to u/TATiredofmyMIL for comment.