Dad Cheered for Response to Wife's 'Ridiculous Homophobia' Toward Daughter

The internet has backed a dad for his reaction after his daughter chose to exclude her mom from meeting her new girlfriend.

In a post with more than 11,000 upvotes and thousands of comments and reactions, the father—Reddit user u/lucaslancom—explained how his 16-year-old daughter had come out to her parents a year earlier and his wife had not reacted well.

In a study published by the Pew Research Center, a number of LGBTQ+ survey respondents were asked a series of questions about their sexuality and coming-out experience.

The median age that respondents said they themselves felt they might be something other than straight or heterosexual was 12 years old. Some 56 percent of LGBT adults said they told their mother about their sexuality, while only 39 percent report having told their father.

Of those who have come out to their parents, 59 percent said that it was difficult to tell their mother, but 39 percent said that after telling them about their sexual orientation, their relationship became stronger.

But the story shared Tuesday on Reddit revealed a more negative outcome for the teenage girl. In the post, the dad wrote: "My wife is extremely, extremely religious and is very against anything other than what is written in the Bible. I'm still religious but once [our daughter] Harley arrived, it got me thinking that what if my daughter does something that doesn't fit into my beliefs?"

He revealed that a year ago his daughter told him that she likes girls, and they sat down together to tell her mother, but it did not go well.

"She was not happy with it, my wife didn't say anything to her and just looked disappointed," said the dad: "I was upset at this, as long as her partners aren't hurting her in any way, it's not our place to shame her for that."

Later, the dad discovered his wife had been going to her daughter with male-only dating apps, trying to set her up with guys and even telling her that it was "not normal" and that she needed to go to confession because her feelings were "a phase."

"This went on for months and I had no idea," said the dad: "She would stop when I was around. My daughter ended up breaking down when I asked her what was going on and told me everything. To say I was angry would be an understatement."

Furious at his wife, the couple slept apart and attended marriage counseling, but he said he doesn't feel his wife has changed much. "She still lets these comments slip," he wrote, "but bites her tongue more I guess."

Recently, issues had resurfaced after the man's daughter started dating a new girl and wanted her dad to meet her. But when she sat down to tell her parents about this, she said she didn't want her mother to go, saying she did not trust her mom not to make a comment.

"As I was getting ready my wife was mad, saying that she couldn't believe she could exclude her from this," wrote the dad on Reddit. "I said she shouldn't be, she's made our daughter feel this way and the only way to fix it is to get over her ridiculous homophobia. I told her that she's letting her religion get in the way of the love for her daughter and in a few more years she'll be asking why she doesn't talk to her anymore."

Upset, the wife stopped speaking to her husband and close family—and the couple's therapist—and had since told the man he was wrong for his comments. But he asked the internet, "Am I the a**hole?"

Before long, comments began flooding in from Redditors who overwhelmingly sided with the dad and his reaction.

"Absolutely NTA [not the a**hole]," said one commenter: "You are on your daughter's side and she will never forget this. You putting down a boundary to further protect her and her gf is reasonable."

Another reply said: "I can't imagine it's easy to be in your shoes. Good on you for supporting your daughter and keeping it real with your wife."

"You're being a good dad, shame your wife is a bad mom," said another comment: "You guys need a better therapist, and you should also at least consider divorce."

Newsweek has reached out to u/lucaslancom for comment. We were unable to verify the details of this case.