Fury as Woman Rejects Sister as Bridesmaid as She Doesn't Have 'The Look'

A woman refusing to help her sister with wedding planning is being backed online.

In a post shared to Reddit's Am I the A******? (AITA) forum on November 22, u/Odd-Giraffe3232 said she was disappointed to not be included in her sister's wedding party. Nevertheless, when the maid of honor and 10 bridesmaids "dropped the ball" with the bridal shower and bachelorette party, her sister asked her to take over.

After discovering she was excluded due to her "look," Odd-Giraffe3232 refused to help out. Now, her family is accusing her of being selfish and "ruining her [sister's] special day."

However, fellow Redditors were 100 percent on the poster's side, with her story receiving more than 6,000 upvotes and almost 1,000 comments.

Why Do Weddings Cause So Many Arguments?

Terri DiMatteo, a relationship counselor and the owner of Open Door Therapy, told Newsweek that weddings are "about profound changes in family and friendship circles."

Although a wedding is supposed to be a happy time, these accompanying changes can cause friction.

"Various emotions are expressed in the lead-up to the wedding, but the impact a marriage has on relationships goes beyond the couple themselves," DiMatteo said.

"The situation between the poster and her sister may allow them to grow closer. If the sister comes to the bride's aid in her time of need when she is feeling vulnerable and anxious, it could strengthen their relationship as it may support the notion that 'blood is thicker than water.'

"However, it would be wise for the sisters to agree to devote time, care, and attention to their relationship after all the wedding drama subsides."

Not Having "the Look"

In her post, Odd-Giraffe3232 said that she and her sister "aren't best friends," but close enough that she expected to be included in the bridal party, or even as the maid of honor. However, her sister didn't ask her to be a bridesmaid, choosing 10 of her friends instead.

"I didn't say anything even though I was a little hurt," the poster wrote.

"I totally get that it's her wedding and that I'm not entitled to be in her wedding party, and eventually got over it."

Odd-Giraffe3232's best friend got engaged shortly after, and she did ask her to be maid of honor. She worked hard to make her friend's wedding less stressful and had a lot of fun helping out with the wedding planning. Unfortunately, her sister's maid of honor and bridesmaids have not been much help, leaving her sister in the lurch.

"My sister's MOH honestly dropped the ball," she wrote.

"She hasn't put any effort into helping my sister with her wedding, didn't plan anything, never responds to my sister's messages, and just generally isn't interested at all.

"None of my sister's other bridesmaids are stepping up either (they all have a reason for why they can't spend more time on my sis's wedding)."

After seeing how well her friend's wedding turned out, her sister turned to Odd-Giraffe3232 for support, asking her to plan the bridal shower, bachelorette party, and even help out with the big day. Odd-Giraffe3232 agreed, if she could be a bridesmaid.

"I feel like it's the least she could do and it would make me feel less like an errand girl and really part of the wedding," she said.

"She refused and said that I'd make the numbers off and that I didn't have 'the look' she was trying to accomplish, which REALLY offended me. Like at this point I'm just p*****."

Odd-Giraffe3232 said she'd still help her sister, but only if she paid for her time.

"I said fine, I don't have to be part of the wedding, but then she needs to hire me as a wedding planner because I'm not doing this for free," she wrote.

"It takes a huge time commitment to do all of this work!"

Her sister "went crying to mom and dad," who were angry with Odd-Giraffe3232 for refusing.

"Now my family is saying that I'm ruining her special day by being selfish and making it all about me, so I'm starting to doubt myself," she said.

Reddit users were shocked by her sister's behavior, with Humble-Unit8379 calling the bride a "spoiled brat."

"Well we know who the golden child is, said Ohionina.

"Your family didn't make a stink about you being excluded, but now they flip out because you won't become her servant?"

Physical_Ad515 agreed, writing: "The crying to mom and dad would be it for me.

"You should not be willing to do this under any circumstance now. Even if she makes you a bridesmaid."

MotherEastern3051 said: "Your sister sounds very superficial and snobby, maybe that explains why nobody is falling over themselves to help her."

While Peep_Power_77 commented: "This is what the sister gets for recruiting 10 bridesmaids based on 'a look.'

"She's got her look. And completely deserved chaos."

Odd-Giraffe3232 isn't the only one to fall out with her family over a wedding. Redditors urged a woman to uninvite her family from her upcoming nuptials, after she discovered they'd been making bets on how long the relationship will last, while relationship experts recently advised a reader terrified of attending a homophobic family wedding with her wife in our What Should I Do? column.

Newsweek reached out to u/Odd-Giraffe3232 for comment. We couldn't verify the details of the case.