Wife Urged Not To Leave Home After Husband 'Walked Out' of 17-Year Marriage

A man who reportedly "walked out" on his wife of 17 years and two children, including a newborn, has been slammed by Mumsnet readers.

The woman, who posted on the U.K.-based parenting forum with the username ReySky, wrote that he told her he was "fed up." There was "no chance of reconciliation and it's because I haven't been affectionate or loving enough."

The couple have two sons, a "2.8 year old" and a 10-week-old baby. The mom wrote that she had tried to "explain to him about me feeling sleep deprived and touched out (am breastfeeding)."

She added: "I had a really rough pregnancy and birth, I've only stopped bleeding in [the] last couple of days.

"I just feel absolutely drained and am finding it so difficult to look after both boys while crying constantly."

In a 2019 study of 2,371 Danish people, titled 'I Had Not Seen Star Wars' and Other Motives for Divorce in Denmark, the most frequently stated motives included a "lack of love/intimacy and "growing apart."

In the Mumsnet case, there might be other problems. The woman wrote in a later post that she "had a quick snoop" in her husband's backpack while he was out of the house and found "a massive bag of weed."

She said she had also found "a bunch of empty packets of Reletrans"—a strong opioid painkiller that comes in the form of skin patches—"but he hasn't had any pain issues. So I'm thinking there's some addictions going on. I don't even recognise him anymore."

The woman wrote that he was spending money while the family had been struggling financially: "I'm buying the boys second hand clothes off ebay and selling things on Facebook to try and save some money for son's 3rd birthday party and he's buying £80 trainers and weed. I'm raging...I just want him gone now."

The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy states: "If you or your partner are showing signs of having a problem with drugs or alcohol and there are problems in the relationship, it is common to hope these things will take care of themselves over time.

"Unfortunately, that rarely happens. The better thing to do is to get treatment as soon as possible…if you don't, the problems are very likely to get worse."

Many Mumsnet users shared messages of support for the woman, with several warning her not to move out of the family home.

HappyAsASandboy advised her to "stay in the house if you possibly can," explaining: "If you move out to a relatives then he will move back in, and then you'll have nowhere to go unless you're happy to houseshare with someone causing you a lot of pain. So stay in the house and hope he has the decency to stay out of it."

User gingertoast was one of many telling her she was not to blame. "Please don't believe this is due to your not showing him enough affection. He's scapegoating you for his own decision." They added: "Do not leave your home. He chose this path and now he has to pay for it."

Others urged the original poster to reach out to friends and family.

Candleabra said: "Well you know who he is now. A man who could leave you and his children in an incredibly vulnerable state is not worth knowing...reach out to people, don't think you have to struggle on alone."

Umbongoberyl posted: "He's cold, detached, scraping the barrel for excuses. what an absolute a**hole leaving you at this point. Call friends/family immediately get help."

Fireflygal said: "You are not to blame, no decent man leaves when there is a newborn. He is utterly selfish...it will get better but you need to recover from the shock first."

Newsweek has not been able to verify the details of this case.