Internet Rages After Woman Not Invited to Husband's 50th Birthday Party

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Mumsnet users are supporting a woman who wasn't invited to her own husband's 50th birthday party.

Sharing her story with shocked users on the platform's Talk forum, Jellybaby282820 explained that her husband's work decided to throw him a surprise party for his birthday—but she wasn't allowed to come.

She wrote: "I had a text from my husbands work (his own company) where he employs mostly friends and in the past some family.

"The text I got was to tell me not to plan anything for his birthday as they were throwing him a surprise party at around tea time on his actual birthday but that maybe I could plan something for later in the evening when he's home.

Woman Not Invited to Husband’s Birthday Party
Stock photo of a middle-aged couple arguing. The man's work colleagues informed the woman of the surprise party—and let her know she wasn't invited. Wavebreakmedia/iStock/Getty Images Plus

"The text said it was [for] staff only and not in work time and I wasn't invited!"

In her post, the woman explained that her husband owned the company and that most of the employees were friends or family members. When she told her husband about the text, he accused her of being jealous.

She continued: "I spoke to my husband and said I was upset as it's not like we could go for a meal after his meal!

"He told me I'm jealous, controlling and a narcissistic b**** and that I won't even let him have a party without [me]!

"I didn't want him not to go but just to be considered. He's now offered to take the day off instead which leaves me even more confused as to why I couldn't celebrate also."

Concluding her post, the woman asked if she was being unreasonable.

She said: "im so hurt and upset but I'm wondering if I'm overreacting and shouldn't have even mentioned it."

Mumsnet users were quick to support the woman, with many of the 400 post comments from people expressing concern about her husband's behavior.

Britneyisfree said: "Everything about this sounds wrong. You need a divorce."

Octomore agreed, writing: "He obviously doesn't treat you with respect. And his colleagues/friends are taking his lead.

"Why are you with someone who treats you like this?"

SandyWedges commented: "I hope you surprise him with divorce papers."

A 2017 study of 355 couples found a link between disapproval of a partner's friends and divorce. Researchers found that a man's dislike of his wife's friends (or their dislike of him) made couples more likely to divorce than a wife's disapproval of her husband's friends.

Some users wondered why the poster wasn't invited, and if there was more to the story.

"This seems an extreme reaction," said RevoltingHumanHead. "Is it based on something other than this party issue?"

Basilbrushgotfat wrote: "His work colleagues are laying claim to his actual birthday without consultation and you're not welcome?!

"And then his attitude to you? I don't know which of them is worse."

JamesBlond commented: "This is all extremely strange. The work party on his actual birthday, with work people asserting that you can't come AND you also don't take priority for his time on the day."

However, some users felt that the poster was in the wrong, with JessicaBrassica saying: "I'm confused. His colleagues, with whom he gets on well, organized a small surprise party at the end of the working day to celebrate his birthday.

"And you a) told him and b) threw a tantrum that you weren't invited to his works do. Why? Just why? Sounds massively spoiled and selfish."

Anniefrenchfry wrote: "I actually think it's fine to have a staff do and not have it partnered, I assume you don't work there? I've celebrated with my work colleagues and not invited partners.

"[I'm] shocked you made it all about you and told him."

Jellybaby282820 isn't the only one to seek solace for their party-related drama online. Last week, Reddit users backed a man who made his step-son clean the house instead of attending his best friend's birthday party, while another was praised for canceling his wife's shindig after she refused to bring his daughter to the restaurant over her "improper birthday attire."

In a more positive birthday story to go viral, one woman planned 60 days of presents for her mom's milestone 60th birthday, which TikTok users described as "precious."

If you have a similar family dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.

About the writer

Sophie is a Newsweek Pop Culture and Entertainment Reporter based in Lincoln, UK. Her focus is reporting on film and TV, trending news and the entertainment industry. She has covered pop culture, women's rights and the arts extensively. Sophie joined Newsweek in 2022 from Social Change UK, and has previously written for The Untitled Magazine, The Mary Sue, Ms. Magazine and Screen Rant. She graduated with a BA Honours in Fine Art from Birmingham City University and has an MA in Arts Journalism from the University of Lincoln. Languages: English.

You can get in touch with Sophie by emailing s.lloyd@newsweek.com.


Sophie is a Newsweek Pop Culture and Entertainment Reporter based in Lincoln, UK. Her focus is reporting on film and ... Read more