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A woman who says she was devastated by her husband's prank where he pretended to have an affair is being supported now that he's distant towards her because her reaction wasn't what he expected.
The original poster (OP), u/LLostInDespair, shared her story to the popular r/TrueOffMyChest Reddit forum where people anonymously share secrets they've held. She earned over 14,400 upvotes and 3,800 comments in eight hours for her post, "I didn't react the right way to my husbands cheating prank and now our marriage is not the same. I don't want a divorce over such a ridiculous thing."
She opens by saying both she and her husband are in their thirties, lest people think that his immature actions make readers think they're young.
A month ago, her husband left his tablet on the kitchen counter after breakfast as she did the washing up and he went to the gym—though she notes that all morning he seemed to try to get her to notice the tablet. While loading the dishwasher, she saw a text pop up on the tablet from someone named "Eve," depicting a nude woman's torso and the text "you miss this?"
"I froze in my tracks. We've been married for 2 years and we have two children together m5 and f3. Against my better judgment I started looking and there was this full conversation for over a week. He was cheating on me with this Eve," u/LLostInDespair wrote.
She says that seeing the conversation was devastating to her and she "ran to the bathroom vomiting and crying" after reading it. When her husband returned home, she gave him the tablet, said he had a message from Eve and that she needed to go out for a walk, so he needed to watch the kids.
During her walk, which lasted three hours, he repeatedly texted to see if she was okay, and she would always reply that she was "fine"—even though she said she never cried "this much my entire life." Once she returned home, she confronted her husband, saying she knew about the affair and asked how they were going to handle the divorce without hurting the children.
"'Is that really all your reaction? Are you f**king serious right now??'" she recalls him saying.
She said she was exhausted and couldn't discuss it anymore, while he accused her of being "careless and cold." He then insisted she call Eve—which she refused, as she "couldn't believe how cruel he was being wanting me to call his mistress." But he demanded again and she did—and it turned out it was one of her husband's friends, laughing that it was a prank.
"It took me a few moments to get it but then I started crying. My husband was livid at the way I handled the prank. He was disappointed that I didn't care enough. I don't know what he wanted me to do. He couldn't explain what he expected me to act. He just yelled that he didn't expect this," u/LLostInDespair wrote.
Even though it's been a month, she says her husband is still "cold and distant." She's apologized, and said that had it been true it would have "broken" her, as it did when she believed it. But he's calling her "cold and apathetic" and is now acting that way towards her, calling her reaction "abnormal." He's also refusing to go to therapy about the incident and is "refusing any type of conversation."
In a followup comment, she says that she is still having nightmares following the prank.
While some pranks can be fun, generally relationships aren't something to joke about. For example, one woman wrote into Slate's "Dear Prudence" advice column by Jenée Desmond-Harris, asking if she was right to demand a divorce from her husband immediately following a prank at her wedding reception.
She told Desmond-Harris that while she didn't particularly care about getting married, her now-husband did. And though each worked equally to organize the wedding, she'd often compromise with him, telling him her only rule was that he not rub cake in her face at the reception.
Instead, he shoved her head down into the wedding cake, destroying it—though with cupcakes on hand as a backup, showing it was planned. The bride is claustrophobic after a car accident and said that being held into the cake caused a panic attack.
The next day she said the relationship was over and that she wanted a divorce or annulment. Though she says everyone she knows says she should give him another chance, she's holding firm—but wrote in to see if she was right.
Desmond-Harris agreed with the bride, calling his prank a "red flag," and told her to "make a mental note about which of your loved ones don't seem to value your happiness," and divorce him.
Other stories of pranks gone wrong include a maid of honor ditching her sister's wedding after the groom and his best man humiliated her and a woman whose past prank led to a blowup in front of family when she announced her pregnancy—but for real, this time.
Redditors backed u/LLostInDespair and slammed her husband.
"This is literally the stupidest husband in the world. What a complete idiot- and an a**hole. He ENJOYED seeing his wife upset. I would exit this relationship very quickly," u/Playbackfromwayback wrote.
"Your reaction was not wrong and tell him clearly that the result of cheating is always going to be seperation. There won't be any conversation or compassion towards him if he cheated. And if he thinks this is unfair or expects something more, he better think twice before cheating in reality," u/kingsnowsand wrote.
"Hahaha he would not have liked my reaction, I'm sure. I would have called his a** and asked him to run some errands after the gym to keep him out awhile. Then I would have posted alllll the texts and s**t to his [Facebook] account as soon as I found it and tagged every family member and mutual friend we had. Then packed my s**t, my kids s**t, and been gone by the time he came home, with all his s**t blocked, chilling at my aunt's house doing divorce lawyer zoom consults. He wouldn't have been given a chance to explain and HAD he explained with this [weak] a** 'you responded wrong to my bulls**t prank!1!' s**t, I would have went the f**k off and still divorced his a** bc WHO [THE F**K] DOES THAT S**T??" u/Famous-Chemistry-530 wrote.
"Op stop kissing his a** (sorry to be blunt) and tell him his a** needs to be groveling to YOU. HE did this, NOT you. And therapy would be MANDATORY and the VERY LEAST thing he would be doing to keep his family. F**k this immature nonsense," they continued.
"She handled it with grace and maturity. Something he cannot comprehend, because he has neither," u/thegreatmei wrote. "It's abusive to hurt your partner for fun. What is he going to do in the future for an encore? And what kind of father will he be if he doesn't get his way and sulks, and cold shoulder is his response? Plus, what kind of messed up things will he pull with his kids for entertainment?"
Newsweek reached out to u/LLostInDespair for comment.
About the writer
Matt Keeley is a Newsweek editor based in Seattle. His focus is reporting on trends and internet culture. He has ... Read more