Man Slammed for Telling Wife He Hopes Baby Looks 'Nothing Like' Her

Commenters criticized a man after he told his pregnant wife that he hopes their daughter looks nothing like her during a toast in front of relatives.

The anonymous woman, known as u/Lillington579, posted about the incident on Reddit's popular "Am I The A**hole" forum where it received more than 12,000 upvotes and 2,200 comments with many saying the man's comments were emotionally abusive. The post can be found here.

Emotional abuse, also called psychological abuse, involves attempts at isolating, frightening, or controlling an individual, according to Healthline. A common tactic of emotional abuse is to undermine an individual's self-esteem.

Some examples include making patronizing comments, telling them to "take a joke" and embarrassing them in public.

In the post titled "AITA for leaving in the middle of celebration because of the toast my husband gave?" the woman, 25, said she is pregnant with her and her husband's, 31, first baby.

They recently found out that the baby is a girl and her in-laws threw them a dinner to celebrate the reveal.

When they arrived at the dinner, the woman said she was nervous because there were more people in attendance than she expected and she is not a fan of crowds.

She said she was upset her husband didn't warn her about the number of people coming but stayed calm, although she barely ate because of her anxiety.

During the celebration, her husband said he wanted to give a toast.

"He opened a bottle and poured a drink and wished that our daughter be 'healthy, happy, but look nothing like me,'" the post read. "Everyone at the table laughed. I sat there staring in shock while he kept laughing with them."

Feeling rage and anxiety, the woman said she grabbed her belongings and left, with her mother-in-law following behind.

The woman said she wanted to go home, but when her husband walked through the door they began arguing.

"He said this was a 'joke toast' and that my reaction was over the top," the post read. "But the thing is ever since I got pregnant he kept hinting he doesn't want our daughter to look like me. He even once got up in the morning and first thing he told me was how much he wished our daughter look nothing like me."

She said the comments hurt since she is already dealing with anxiety and low self-esteem, but when she told her husband she wanted to go home, he said she was "being a baby" and needed to learn to "take a joke."

He also told her that walking out of the dinner was disrespectful to his relatives who came to celebrate.

"I went home and he called many times telling me to get my 'insecurities' in check before I pass them on to our daughter," the post read. "He urged me to get therapy and stop acting so dramatically like how I did in front of his family."

Redditors Reactions

More than 2,200 users commented on the post, with many criticizing the man for his "bullying" and "abusive" behavior.

"Emotional abuse is not a joke," one user wrote.

"Leaving is the best solution? Yes. And not just the dinner. He has said more than once he doesn't want his child to look like you," one user commented. "Pay attention. He has shown you exactly who he is and what he really thinks of you. Believe him."

"He's also bullying you for the insecurities HE'S REINFORCING IN YOU," another user added. "This is abusive behavior, OP. You don't deserve it, and neither will your daughter. Because your husband is 100% the kind of AH that will make sure your daughter has similar self-esteem issues in order to control her as well."

"This really does sound abusive. NTA," another user wrote. "Your husband needs to knock off the "jokes" and grow up. And I think you should get some therapy to learn to value yourself."

Newsweek reached out to u/Lillington579 for comment.

Another man was slammed by users on Reddit after he told his wife to "hurry up" while she was cooking Thanksgiving dinner for the family.

"The behavior you've described is clinically termed verbal and emotional abuse," one user commented.

One man was criticized after he hid his girlfriend's passport to prevent her from visiting a friend in Mexico.

Another man was roasted online after he replied to his wife's text about being pregnant with a "K."