'We Quit Our Jobs To Become Tradwives'

Seven decades ago, men would "bring home the bacon" while their wives cooked and cleaned at home. In those days nobody questioned their lifestyles as it was the "norm." However, some people find it hard to believe that women are quitting their jobs to live like it's the 1950s again.

Newsweek spoke to two married women who have abandoned their careers to embrace traditional roles. With their husbands expecting a tidy home and dinner on the table, the women explain why they enjoy taking on the role of a traditional wife.

Lauren, 31, and Kila, 39, have given Newsweek an insight into their lives, which involve making bread from scratch, cleaning the house daily and attending to their husband's needs.

Stripping back to basics can come with a price though, as they could be putting themselves in a "risky position" according to a family attorney who spoke to Newsweek about traditional roles in a marriage. But the two women couldn't be prouder of their lifestyles.

'I Am So Grateful'

Prior to meeting Benny Wylde, her now-husband, Lauren worked as a nanny and social media manager. But she started to fulfill the role of a homemaker when she moved more than 9,900 miles from her native Ontario in Canada to start a new life with Ben, from Adelaide, Australia.

Now, more than three years on, Lauren, 31, spends most of the week in their home, while Benny runs his wedding photography business. She does household chores, prepares meals from scratch, bakes bread, tends to her garden and chickens, or works on sewing projects.

"I spend a lot of time in the kitchen, it's truly my happy place," she told Newsweek. "Some mornings I am baking sourdough, some days I'm making pizza dough for dinner. I cook all of our food from scratch, so I am in the kitchen preparing breakfast, lunch, and dinner."

"Everyone usually complains about cooking and cleaning but I have realized there is joy and beauty in the mundane things.

"I am so grateful to be caring for our home and my husband.

"Homemaking has shown me the importance of a positive mindset and I have so much gratitude for the life we live," she added.

Lauren states that she and Benny have flourished in their traditional roles and she enjoys nothing more than being the nurturer and keeper of their home.

Using the Instagram handle @ourquaintandcozy, Lauren shares her day-to-day life. In many pictures, she can be seen donning an apron or vintage nightgown.

She told Newsweek that her style hasn't always been this way but that she started dressing modestly early last year, as she started delving deeper into her role as a homemaker.

"Embracing traditional gender roles has allowed me to come into my own as a person. I find so much joy in being a homemaker," she said. "I hope to encourage people to find the magic in the mundane."

While a majority of the comments she receives online are positive, she has also been subjected to cruel jibes from strangers.

"It seems like some people get triggered by 'unconventional' lifestyles," Lauren said.

"Strangers have told me I'm oppressed and seem to insinuate that because I'm a homemaker, I must be forced to stay home by my husband," she said. "But they completely disregard the fact that I have chosen this lifestyle and that I'm happy, in marriage and at home."

It turns out she isn't the only traditional wife, aka "trad wife," to receive backlash online. Kila, who preferred not to share her surname, told Newsweek about the assumptions people make about her lifestyle.

The mom-of-three said: "A lot of people think you don't have any freedom, but for me, it has allowed me to have the freedom to pursue anything I want.

"I receive a mixture of opinions online, some people imply I am a slave but I disagree."

'I Expect Him to Bring Home a Paycheck'

Unlike Lauren, Kila's husband James, 38, works away from the family home but he still "expects" his wife to maintain a tidy home and have his dinner on the table when he returns from a stint working on an oilfield.

Kila, from Alberta, Canada, said: "People get very upset about the word 'expect'— but if you turn the tables, I expect him to go to work and bring back a paycheck.

"He expects me to do my best to take care of the home that he pays for and take care of our children, there is an expectation and I think that is fair otherwise where is the bar?

"We are always trying to have good expectations."

In 2020, Kila was working full-time in sales and marketing and admits she felt worn down.

"My mental health has dramatically improved since letting go of success on the career ladder," she said. "My world revolved around work and I didn't have time or patience with my kids. James is literally giving me a beautiful life that I am grateful for."

It Might Not Be Economical for the Wife To Work

However, attorney and mediator Kristyn Carmichael has seen traditional marriages fall apart, leaving the woman on the breadline.

"Traditional roles for one spouse or the other can have substantial detriments," Carmichael, who is also a certified divorce financial analyst for Couples Solutions Center in Arizona, told Newsweek.

"Divorce is a very common occurrence and a spouse in a traditional stay-at-home role is putting themselves in a risky position," she said. "Statistically, more women end up in poverty post-divorce than men, which could directly relate to their dependence on their spouse during their marriage.

"Many of the women I have worked with have very little understanding of their finances, low-income earning capacity, and not many skills that can translate into a work environment.

"Additionally, the highest rate of divorce is currently gray divorce, i.e. getting divorced when you are retiring or after retirement. At this age, it can be even more difficult for a stay-at-home spouse to return to work."

It isn't all bad news though, as Carmichael notes there are major benefits to a traditional lifestyle, such as minimizing outside care expenses like child-care costs.

"If the bread-winning spouse is making enough money to care for the household, then it can be large cost savings for a family unit if one spouse takes on a more traditional role of staying home," Carmichael said. "Ultimately, it is not economical for her to return to work because it would be more costly for the family unit."

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