Melissa Rivers On Being A Nepo Baby: 'I Didn't Know My Parents Were Famous'

From feuding with celebrities to skewering A-list fashion choices on the red carpet, Joan Rivers wasn't afraid to court a little controversy. Gracing TV screens and performing stand-up shows for more than five decades, Rivers' legendary laugh and razor-sharp wit made her an icon in the male-dominated world of comedy.

Whether you loved or hated the acid-tongued performer and her candid humor, you can't deny the impact that Rivers—who passed away in 2014 at the age of 81—had on the entertainment industry.

But, what was it like to grow up with a mom who roasted celebrities for a living, and whose legacy—both good and bad—still influences your entire life and career?

In an exclusive interview with Newsweek, Melissa Rivers shares what it was like to be raised by the divisive Joan, as well as the pros and cons of being a "nepo baby."

On the slim chance you haven't come across the term, a "nepo baby" is someone whose family connections helps them get ahead. Of course, nepotism isn't limited to those in the limelight. It's common for children to follow in their parent's footsteps, from doctors to lawyers.

But unlike celebrity offspring, the future butchers of America are unlikely to get trolled on social media (such as Lily-Rose Depp or Maude Apatow), or face preconceptions based on their parent's public image—for better or worse.

Melissa Rivers knows the latter very well. The 55-year-old actress and television host has always been open about having a famous mom, releasing three books on their relationship.

"People say 'Oh my God you work so hard. Oh my God, you're so grounded, you're so nice,'" Rivers told Newsweek. "If I have to hear one more time 'you're not at all what I expected.' My mother always said that one of her biggest frustrations in life is that I will never get full credit for what I've accomplished."

"I did not know my parents were famous until I was in high school"

Her parents, Edger Rosenberg and Joan, may have been showbiz heavyweights, but Rivers' childhood was surprisingly normal.

"It didn't start to dawn on me that [my parents were famous] until I was in high school," she said. "People would be like 'Oh my God, did you hear what your mom said last night?'"

Growing up in the 1970s and 1980s, Rivers' parents worked hard to shield her from the public eye. She was expected to study hard and was given age-appropriate chores. Her parents emphasized the importance of manners.

"I had a very normal childhood. My parents actively made it that way," she said. "We had a couple of maids, a housekeeper and a nanny, but that didn't matter. I was still expected to clear the table. I've tried to replicate that with my son."

Born Joan Alexandra Molinsky in 1933, her mother was the daughter of Russian immigrants and spent the majority of her childhood in Brooklyn. As her star power rose, Joan Rivers never forgot where she came from—or the strong work ethic her parents instilled in her.

Melissa's father, Edger, founded the production company Telsun Foundation Inc. and worked on The Late Show with his wife. He was also a dedicated family man and devoted husband until his death in 1987, and like Joan, was determined that their daughter stayed humble.

"I was always taught that wealth was a privilege," Rivers said. "[My parents] saw a dangerous road ahead. They saw how some of their peers were raising their kids and they knew that's not the way they wanted to raise me."

The elder Rivers also never took her success for granted. Although she supported her daughter's desire to pursue a career in entertainment, she also impressed upon her the fickleness of fame.

"She would be doing a show or something and they would send a car to pick her up, she would always say 'I'm 80 years old and they're still sending a car to pick me up. Isn't that great?'" Rivers said. "Until the day she died, she [still had a sense] of awe and gratitude."

They made it clear what was real-life, and what was fake—'Flash the famous face!'

When it came to fame, her mom and dad enforced strict boundaries between their work and home lives. On stage, Joan let her "snarky" comments reign, but her spicy alter-ago never made an appearance at home.

"She was always funny, but she would get anxious at stuff like parties," Rivers said. "She was scared that if she wasn't as funny as people perceived, they would be disappointed."

Rivers said her mom had a "work persona" and a "home persona," and as a seasoned professional, could jump between the two instantaneously.

"She had a thing called 'FFF'—'Flash the Famous Face,'" Rivers explained. "There was a huge difference."

The biggest fallout Joan Rivers and Melissa ever had

Between 2010 and 2014, Melissa Rivers would guest star on Fashion Police, the weekly fashion commentary show her mom hosted on E!

She also co-created and co-produced the web series In Bed With Joan, in which her mom would interview celebrities (including Margaret Cho, Kathy Griffin and RuPaul) in her bed.

The pair had many good times while working together, but there were also rough patches. At one point, her mom accidentally got her dropped from a project they were working on together.

While pregnant with her son, Joan was concerned that Melissa was overdoing it, leading to the "biggest work argument" the pair ever had.

"I had a very rough first trimester, so she was worried on a personal level, and then we were disagreeing at work," she said. "It went up the food chain, and I got a call saying 'you cannot work anymore while you're pregnant, we can't allow you to do that.'"

Furious, she called her mom and yelled "Are you f****** happy now?" Joan was mortified and called the boss, explaining that a personal issue had spilled over and she was allowed to come back to work.

"We just never thought about [others'] perception of what was going on," Rivers said. "I think she said 'I don't want her working like this,' and the network was like 'Oh s***.'"

What Joan Rivers would have thought of 'cancel culture'

Launching her showbiz career in the 1960s, Joan Rivers was a trailblazer for women in film and TV. Nevertheless, her career was filled with highs and lows.

From joking that "Michelle Obama is trans" to referencing the Holocaust on the Academy Awards red carpet, the comedian knew how to cause an uproar. Whether people loved or hated her mother, Melissa Rivers is thrilled with her legacy.

"Someone said to me, when Barbara Walters died, that women like her and my mom had to even build the doors that they then had to kick down," Rivers said. "[I didn't ] realize that until I was an adult and had perspective of what the business is really like."

But what would the irreverent Joan Rivers think of "cancel culture?"

Melissa believes her mom's experience would be similar to Dave Chapelle's, whose comments on transgender people led to a backlash and a brief career downfall.

"I think she would have come out of it maybe a little beat up, but fine," she said. "She would have found a way around it, saying things along the lines of 'If I was allowed to tell you this joke, but I can't do that anymore.' She would have spun it into something clever."

Rivers believes her mom would be pleased that people are more sensitive to societal issues, but also would have spoken out if she felt cancel culture had gone too far.

"She was such a champion of marginalized communities," she said. "But the world isn't a 'safe space.'"

'The term 'nepo baby' has taken on a very strange and negative connotation'

Unsurprisingly, the term "nepo baby" isn't popular amongst Hollywood's elite, but Rivers doesn't understand the criticism lobbied at celebrity children.

"Nepo baby has taken on a very strange and negative connotation," she said. "Besides royalty, wouldn't one of the first people we can call a 'nepo baby' be [former President] John Quincy Adams? I have friends who are doctors because their parents were doctors and work at the same hospital. Does that make them 'nepo babies?'"

She dislikes that "nepo baby" is such a vague term, and that some famous faces receive more criticism than others.

"Nobody wants to drill down on what it means, you know?" Rivers said. "It might get you the meeting. It might even get you the job, but it's not gonna help you keep the job. All the successful [nepo babies] are successful because they were capable."