Mom Backed for Leaving Her Nephew 'Stranded' After He Damaged Her TV

A woman has sparked a debate online after refusing to watch her nephew again because he scratched her TV and his mother refused to pay for the damage or even apologize.

In a post on parenting forum Mumsnet on Wednesday, the woman explained that she is a stay-at-home mom while her sister is single parent to a 9-year-old boy, so she helps out with child care. She picks up her nephew from school every day and looks after him for two to three hours until his mom has finished work.

Child care is a big expense for many American parents. A survey from Care.com has found that 58 percent of families plan to spend more than $10,000 on it this year. The study also reported above-inflation increases in the cost of child care since 2019.

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The woman, posting as Missmerry, said her nephew was usually well behaved and would sit doing his homework or playing games. However, a few days ago, she found scratches on the screen of her big TV, which is in the back room where he plays video games. Since her 2-year-old daughter was taking a nap in her bedroom at the time—and could not in any case reach that high—she thought it must have been her nephew.

It looked as though liquid had been spilled on the TV and carpet, though drinks and snacks are not allowed in the back room, Missmerry said. There were spots on the carpet and the TV screen had a circular pattern of marks on it, as though "someone had tried to clean it, but with something rough enough to leave scratches."

When the woman asked her nephew, he denied any involvement and said it must have been her daughter. When the boy's mother arrived to pick him up, she also tried to pin the blame on the toddler—and on Missmerry's lax child care skills, saying it was her responsibility to watch him.

At this point, the woman told her sister she could forget about child care for her son unless she paid for the damage to the TV, which cost £1,500 (about $1,625). Missmerry later confirmed that she would no longer pick him up from school, though her sister didn't believe she was "going to leave her son stranded."

Was her decision unreasonable, she asked Mumsnet users. Some of the 600-plus commenters thought it was entirely fair since his mom didn't even apologize.

DappledYork wrote: "For someone who doesn't have a lot of options, she needs to pull her horns in."

FlyingandFrankie said: "Yeah I wouldn't be watching him again either. Your sister can sort her own s*** out."

MessyBunPersonified posted: "She sounds ungrateful as f*** aside from anything else. I wouldn't sway on this, he lied and his mum stuck up for him, that's only taught him he can get away with stuff at your house.

"Don't stress, you've given her plenty of notice, her kid is her responsibility. Can you claim on insurance if she won't pay?"

Others felt she had overreacted. HannaHanna said: "I really couldn't push it this far with my own nephew. In fact, I don't think I'd ever ask anyone to pay for anything broken in my own house by their child. It goes with the territory.

"I am sure he lied but he's just a kid and probably scared. His mom may not be handling it well, but I think you are being unreasonable here. You want to completely end a family relationship over a television?"

SarahSissions also thought Missmerry was "being very harsh." She said: "You are essentially asking a single mum to pay £1500 for child care. That's a frightening amount of money. A month's wages for many people."

But another user, WimpoleHat, felt that the sister was more unreasonable: "She obviously isn't happy with the standard of your (free) childcare, so I think you'd be wise not to do it anymore and let her find someone else to supervise him more closely. She sounds ungrateful as hell."

DappledYork said: "You need to leave him stranded today, otherwise she is going to walk all over you forever more. Don't pick up when she rings you.

"It's not so much the money but the fact that she didn't apologize and spoke to you as if she is the one doing you a favor. This is your chance to wipe doormat from your forehead and if you don't take it—go along to the tattoo parlor tomorrow and have it permanently inked there."

Some Mumsnet users suggested she should have asked her sister to pay the insurance deductible, rather than for the whole TV.

In a follow-up post, Missmerry said she had calmed down and was planning to call her insurance company—and to take a break from her sister.

Newsweek has not been able to verify the details of the case.