Mom Telling Ex's Wife Truth About Their Son Cheered: 'Ruin Their Marriage'

The internet has backed a mom who told his ex's wife that he was lying to her.

In a post on Reddit's popular r/AmITheA**hole forum, user u/throwaway_867497 shared the story as she explained that she has a 13-year-old son from a previous relationship.

When the couple was just 18 and 19 years old, they split up because the man—Chris—told her that his family would never accept her as a woman of color.

But the Redditor found out she was pregnant a few weeks later, and when she told Chris he was not interested.

"He basically told me to stay out of his life," she said. "I didn't contact Chris again after that. I even transferred colleges, but I kept in touch with the friends I had there."

When she gave birth to her son, Adam, she contacted a few people but generally kept it to herself—focusing on her child. "I didn't think to worry about Chris beyond maybe helping Adam track him down someday when he was older," said the Redditor.

But a few months ago, she received a message from a mutual college friend that Chris was asking for her number. After agreeing, Chris text to ask if he could get to know his son.

"I told him I'd talk to Adam about it first, and Adam eventually agreed to start talking to him. They've had pretty consistent messages back and forth and one or two phone calls over the past few months," wrote the poster.

Chris invited the teen and his mom to dinner with him and his wife, and all was going well until Adam went to the restroom and Chris went to get something from the car. "When his wife Grace and I were alone, she said that she wasn't judging my choice to do so, but wanted to know why I waited so long to tell Chris he had a son."

"I kind of laughed and told her that I told Chris I was pregnant the day after I found out about it, and he asked me to stay away, so I did. Him not knowing my son was his choice," she wrote.

"She looked shocked and told me that Chris had informed her that he'd only found out about Adam a few months ago. I said I was sorry her husband lied to her but he's known about Adam the whole time."

Rebecca Lockwood is an expert in neuro-linguistic programming, hypnotherapy, positive psychology, and breakthrough coaching. She told Newsweek: "A child coming into the picture after a long-term relationship can be a surprise to either party. If you have an idea of what your life looks like and then suddenly it changes it is normal for people to be unsure about the future and scared about building a relationship when there has been none there for many years."

"Dinner was painfully awkward after that," wrote the Redditor. Later that night, Chris text the Redditor and asked why she had discussed this with his wife.

"I said it wasn't my place to cover for him, but then he replied that I should've just told her to talk to him about it instead of telling her something that could ruin their marriage. He thinks I did it as some 'gotcha' for how things ended for us," she explained.

The mom continued to explain that she knew that the truth may "make waves," but did not feel guilty about it. Asking the internet if she did the right thing, Reddit users rushed to back the woman.

"He created this mess, that's on him," said one commenter.

Another reply said: "The lie was about you. Too bad for him he wanted to be the good guy in his wife's eyes at your expense."

"It's not your place to lie for someone who tossed away a child because it was inconvenient," said another reply: "And the fact you handled everything like a boss is all the better."

"Often in life, we go through things that are hard and it can seem like the easy way out to not tell the whole truth," said Lockwood. "However, if someone then finds out that the truth was not told it can become damaging and ruin relationships and connections. It is always important to open up and talk truthfully as you may be surprised by the outcome."

Newsweek has reached out to u/throwaway_867497 for comment. We were unable to verify the details of this case.