'Unhinged' Man Slammed for Forcing Wife to Wear $300 Dress

Commenters urged a woman to leave her husband after he "deliberately" spilled wine on her during a dinner party so she would have to change into a more expensive dress he picked out.

The anonymous woman, known as u/Carmenhost675, wrote about the incident in Reddit's popular "Am I The A**hole" forum where it received nearly 10,500 upvotes and 2,200 comments. The post can be found here.

According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, humiliating a partner in front of others and policing what they wear are red flag behaviors of an abuser.

Other warning signs of a potential abuser include but are not limited to:

• Unpredictability
• A bad temper
• Demeaning their partner either in public or private
• Controlling all finances
• Control of how their partner acts
• Possessiveness
• Sabotaging of birth control methods

In the post titled "AITA for leaving the restaurant because of what my husband did?" the woman, 29, said her family is working class while her husband, 35, comes from a well off family and has wealthy friends.

"My husband cares about appearances," the post read. "At first he didn't try to control how I look, but did buy me things he said I'd love but nothing was my style really."

After getting married, her husband told her she could choose how she looks except when she is with him or his family.

He introduced her to fashionable brands and bought her new clothes to wear around his family and friends, although she said she was limited in her choices because she prefers "simple" things.

For his friend's upcoming birthday dinner, he bought her a $300 dress. The woman said she didn't like many aspects of the dress and told him she would wear her $60 floral maxi dress.

"He didn't think it was a good idea and said I was violating the 'rules' he gave after we got married but I said the dress he bought wasn't my style," the post read. "I said I either wear my dress or not go. He said fine then whatever but still wasn't happy."

During the dinner, she said her husband moved suddenly and knocked wine all over her dress.

"He freaked out and said that he thankfully had a replacement then pulled out the $300 he previously wanted me to wear out of the bag," the post read. "This whole time I couldn't help but think he deliberately spilled the wine on my floral dress to force me into wearing the other dress."

Her husband handed her the dress and told her to change but instead, she decided to leave the restaurant. As she ordered an Uber home, she began arguing with her husband outside.

He asked why she was "embarrassing" both of them by "behaving" that way, but she said he tricked her into wearing the dress by spilling the wine on her. When she refused to go back inside, her husband allegedly "threw a fit" and called her an "embarrassment."

At home, she told her husband that he disrespected her choice but said she should stop acting "so insensitive" and "getting offended over nothing." He also told her she "made a joke out of him" in front of his friends.

"AITA? did I handle this right?" the woman asked at the end of the post.

More than 2,000 users commented on the post, many supporting the woman's decision to leave the birthday dinner.

"He's punishing you for not following his 'rules' by embarrassing you and forcing you into the dress he picked anyway, with 'plausible' deniability," one user commented. "I have never in my life brought a date a 'spare' dress; the thought would never occur to me."

"NTA, but what the actual f....to just be sitting on a spare dress through a whole dinner? That's unhinged," one user commented.

"Why are you with someone who gives you rules on what you can wear? That's insane and controlling!" another asked.

"Yeah that's abuse. Get out now before you have kids," another commented.

Newsweek reached out to u/Carmenhost675 for comment.

In another viral Reddit thread, a woman was backed for calling out her "racist" mother-in-law after her "sly" comments about her children.

One man was criticized for mocking his multilingual fiancée in front of his work colleagues.

Another woman was urged to leave her "controlling" husband after he cancelled her upcoming job interview.