Woman Applauded for Banning Mother-in-Law's New 'Sexist' Husband From Home

A woman has been praised for banning her father-in-law from the family home over sexist remarks he made during the holidays.

Writing under the handle ChecoPerez in a post shared to Mumsnet, the woman explained that while her mom-in-law and her partner had been together for "around 10 years" they only got married at the start of 2022.

"To be honest, we never really spent much time with them as they lived 150 miles from us, but moved in the summer and now [live] in the next town," she said.

As a result, they have been spending more time together and both she and her husband were quick to notice that her new father-in-law "is sexist."

"He makes comments such as (in reference to female sports commentators) 'what does SHE know about sport? Get her away! No women should ever be in (specific) area' of this sport," she wrote.

Things escalated further over Christmas though when he declared that he was going to go and "watch tv as the kitchen is a women's place for cooking and washing up etc."

The comments drew criticism from both the woman and her husband, who share a young baby and co-parent an 11-year-old girl with her partner's previous partner.

There could be valid reasons to be concerned, with a 2019 study from University College, London finding that women are more likely to suffer poorer mental health after a sexist experience.

According to the research, published in Health Psychology, women who reported sexual discrimination were more likely to suffer clinical depression and were also more likely to suffer from poorer mental health generally over the next four years.

In ChecoPerez's case, the damage may have already been done. Writing in the post, the concerned mom revealed her stepdaughter, reacting to her father-in-law's remarks, was heard to ask her dad "why does he hate women? Is he always this nasty to them?"

As a result, the woman and her husband decided to take action, confronting her mother-in-law to explain they were "uncomfortable" with her husband's views

She "admitted he is sexist" but said she "just ignores it" and urged them to do the same. That was not good enough for the couple though, and they told told her they did not want him in their house "if he has such views."

The mother-in-law was left hurt, calling them "nasty and unreasonable," while attempting to explain that he "can't help his views" as he was "brought up like that."

Ruth E. Freeman, founder and president of Peace at Home Parenting Solutions, told Newsweek the parents should use the father-in-law's comments as "a teaching moment" for their kids.

"Point out that there are a lot of people who believe that certain roles are for men and certain roles are for women," she said. "Explain how this was a much more common belief in the past and how things have changed over the years."

Freeman also felt the couple would be best served by speaking to the father-in-law about his comments.

"It would be more effective to speak directly and describe, without blame or shame, the behaviors he is displaying and how these affect both the mom and her stepdaughter," she said.

"They may need to ban visits but I would start by describing firm and friendly boundaries," Freeman added. "And leave mother-in-law out of this, even if she expresses opinions about the issue. Let them know that your highest priority is raising a daughter with strong self-worth."

Comments on social media were scathing of the father-in-law's remarks.

Tempone said: "No child, especially a girl, should be exposed to that."

RabbitHoleofHell commented: "Your house, your rules. You're an adult so tell him you find his views offensive."

EVHead urged the couple to "stick to your guns," writing: "I'd have called him out over the comments about cooking and washing up. No one gets to act like that in my house!"

Comfyshoes2022 added: "He sounds awful. I would avoid seeing him but I wouldn't ban him in the spirit of maintaining a relationship with the mother-in-law."

Newsweek was not able to verify the details of the case.

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