Woman Backed for Not Paying Family Rent Because Of 'Second Class' Treatment

Members of a popular internet forum defended one woman who refused to pay her family's rent, despite their pleas.

In a viral Reddit post published on r/AmITheA**hole, Redditor u/wndikk (otherwise referred to as the original poster, or OP) described her parents' decades of favoritism towards her brother and detailed the heated aftermath of her decision not to come to their financial rescue.

Titled, "[Am I the a**hole] for refusing to help my parents financially?" the post has received nearly 6,000 upvotes and 600 comments in the last day.

"My parents hate my job and always [call] it 'playing on the computer,'" OP began. "I'm a UI developer and I'm also a woman so they consider it an inappropriate industry for me."

Continuing to explain that her parents have always favored her brother, a bank teller, the original poster said she had largely cut communication with her family as a result.

"I've always done better than my brother in school, sports, etc. buy my parents always see him as better because he's a boy," OP wrote. "I've reduced my contact especially since they are getting pushy with me for not being married at 27."

When the family fell on hard times, however, those channels of communication were conveniently reopened.

"Last year my father lost his job...and then suffered a ton of health problems," OP wrote. "So now they are at risk of losing their house.

"They've had to ask my brother for rent and he pays about $400 a month. But their mortgage and other expenses comes to...$1800 a month and they can't afford it," OP continued. "[They asked] me for help and I've told them no.

"I can afford it...but I'm still bitter about being treated like a second class citizen since I was a child because I'm a girl," OP added. "I told them they can figure out their own way to pay for it and they are p**sed because they think I need to help them because they raised me."

Parental favoritism can have harmful effects and severe repercussions for children of all ages—in the present, and the future.

Still, however, 74 percent of moms and 70 percent of dads reported exhibiting preferential treatment among their children, according to a study published in the Journal of Family Psychology.

When parents favor one child over another, sibling rivalries are ratcheted up and familial relationships erode. And because children are so vulnerable to parental perception, repeated acts of favoritism are sure to damage self-esteem and reinforce negative thought patterns, which often reappear later in life.

"Kids who get the sense that they're less favored are more likely to act out, especially as they enter their teens," pediatrician Dr. Shelly Vaziri Flais said in a 2019 interview with Healthline.

"Having strong self-esteem in those years is so important, and if they already think of themselves as the bad kid, it can turn out so poorly," Flais added.

On numerous occasions, the original poster lamented over the preferential treatment her brother receives and made it clear that favoritism is the reason she refuses to help pay her family's rent.

Throughout the post's comment section, Redditors rallied in support of the original poster's refusal and called out her parents for expecting assistance after nearly three decades of "second class" treatment.

"[Not the a**hole]," Redditor u/Traveling-Techie wrote in the post's top comment, which has received nearly 10,000 upvotes.

"Tell them you can't help them because you're just a girl," they added, sarcastically.

Redditor u/bippityboppitynope, whose comment has received nearly 1,000 upvotes, echoed that sentiment.

"Tell them you wouldn't feel right having money from a job they don't approve of paying their bills," they wrote.

"[Their] mentality hasn't changed about your field of work," Redditor u/MembershipJaded5215 chimed in. "They don't need help. They need to start taking responsibility."

Newsweek reached out to u/wndikk for comment.