Bride's Anger at Groom Defying Wedding Dress Code Criticized: 'Let It Go'

A woman has been ridiculed after taking to an online forum to vent her frustrations at her new husband for defying the strict dress code in place at their wedding.

Dress codes have been an important component for many weddings for centuries, but there are indications that times are changing.

In a 2021 YouGovAmerica poll, 19 percent of U.S. adults said they were in favor of wedding guests being asked to wear a specific color on the big day. By contrast, 59 percent were entirely opposed to the idea.

Those figures might go some way to explaining the vociferous response to the post shared to Mumsnet by a user writing under the handle Purplehair22. According to the post, Purplehair22 recently got married but has been holding on to a gripe from the big day that she has "never addressed" with her new partner.

"At our wedding my husband got ready with the help of his parents," she wrote."For some reason his mom has an issue with doing up the top button (she says it makes men look like snobs) and as a result thought it would be acceptable to let him walk out looking like he's just traveled here from the 70s."

Evidently eager to have everyone looking their very best, the bride said she was dismayed when she realized her husband's "collar was sticking out his blazer and wide open."

"Top 2 buttons were undone! I was so stressed," she wrote. To make matters worse for her, she only realized when looking through their wedding pictures.

When she asked her husband about it, he told her his mom thought since he did not have a tie "it'll look better that way." However, his wife disagreed and has been stewing over the entire incident ever since. "Every time I look at our wedding photos all I can see is the ABBA inspired collar!" she wrote.

But while the newly married woman was evidently still seething from her husband stepping outside the boundaries of what she had planned for their big day, many on social media felt she was blowing the entire thing out of proportion.

Neverknowinglyunreasonable said: "Try to let it go otherwise you'll spend ages tying yourself in knots over this." MrsTerryPratchett agreed, commenting: "It's an incredibly odd thing to be carrying around."

AssignedSlytherinatBirth told her to "put the photos away and live your life" while MerryOldGoat said: "I cannot describe how much this wouldn't concern me."

The wedding experts saw it differently though. Rena Sweeney, the owner of Alchemy Events, a wedding and event planner based in New Orleans, told Newsweek: "It sounds like this bride is caught up in the wedding as opposed to the marriage. I always encourage my couples to try to stay present during the day and remember that after this one day is over, the marriage is what it's all about."

Sweeney sympathized with the bride on one level but ultimately felt it was important to look at the bigger picture. "I can understand her wanting formal photos, and, had this been my couple, I would have suggested he leave the collar buttoned for the group photos, first dance, cake cutting but be free to unbutton it while he's enjoying the reception," she said.

"The bride may have just needed a gentle nudge to remember that she should be focused on wanting the best for her partner, who she loves enough to marry, and they can compromise and both still be happy. This certainly won't be the last time they'll each need to compromise in order to have a successful marriage!"