Mom Cheered for Refusing To Babysit Son's Girlfriend's Baby: 'Said No'

A woman has been backed for refusing to look after her son's girlfriend's baby.

The mom shared the story on Reddit's popular r/AmITheA****** forum on Wednesday where it has since received thousands of upvotes and comments.

U/MsGibberish explained: "My 21-year-old son moved out of my house almost six weeks ago. He met a nice young lady a month ago. She was nine months pregnant when they met."

The new girlfriend had her baby and the mom explained that the couple seemed happy.

"I am happy for them," she wrote. "I think it's kinda weird but it's not my life, and my son is 'in love.' Fine. Whatever makes him happy."

Gail Saltz MD, clinical associate professor of psychiatry at The New York Presbyterian Hospital and host of the How Can I Help? podcast from iHeartRadio, told Newsweek: "New partners or family members can have huge implications on existing relationships as it truly changes the dynamics of everything. A lot of times these growing pains are rough."

Things had become trickier recently when the new mom was arranging to go back to work—meaning she would need someone to care for her new baby.

"Her mom can watch the baby some days, but not all," said the Redditor. "She wanted to know if I can watch the baby some days from 2-10 p.m. I said no."

The woman explained that she had been a single mom for 21 years and was just finding her feet without her son in the family home.

"My life has been all about my son for 21 years. I don't want any major responsibilities right now and honestly, the baby isn't really my grandchild even though they tell me I'm her grandma. She hasn't text me back, and now I'm feeling bad," she wrote.

Taking to the internet to ask if she was in the wrong, replies on the post overwhelmingly backed the mom and said that she should not be expected to care for the baby.

"NTA [not the a******]," said one comment. "I'm willing to babysit occasionally is not the same thing as I'm willing to watch the baby in eight-hour shifts multiple days a week."

"This situation suffers from not enough communication from the very beginning, but could still be resolved with more effective communication going forward," said Saltz. "If this woman had been more open and communicative about her wishes from the start, perhaps this situation would not have escalated as it did. She has just recently found a sense of freedom she hadn't seen in over 20 years, and it's not shameful to want to be selfish with that time."

Another reply said: "Parents who feel entitled to free babysitting from their own relatives are bad enough. Expecting it from your new non-baby-daddy boyfriend's mom is a whole different level of messed up."

"No way this relationship is going to last. Don't get yourself entangled with this woman and her baby," said another Redditor.

"They didn't consider this woman's time and how much she'd be able to spend of it watching the child. The child's bloodline or genetics are not really the issue. The inability to listen to, respect, or have empathy for the needs and desires of your friends and family is the problem," explained Saltz.

But she did have some tips for families who were struggling with similar communication issues or arguments.

Saltz suggested: "Prioritize legitimate conversations—not just bare minimum text messages. Asking a loved one to regularly dedicate their life to watching a baby that is not theirs is not something to inquire about via text. Sit down, in person, and really talk."

Newsweek reached out to u/MsGibberish for comment. We could not verify the details of the case.