Mom Urged Not To Change Baby's Name To Please 'Opinionated' Mother-in-Law

A new mom has taken to the internet to ask if she should change her son's name because of her mother-in-law's reaction.

In a post on Mumsnet on November 15, user 97DS asked: "Should I change my son's name to please my mother-in-law?"

Taylor A. Humphrey, founder of baby name consultancy What's in a Baby Name told Newsweek: "Sadly it's very common for families and friends to express their dismay over a couple's name choices. People feel very comfortable—perhaps a bit too comfortable—sharing their opinions about names, even when those opinions are ill-informed."

With hundreds of replies, the conversation sparked viral reaction as Mumsnet users rushed to share their thoughts and advice.

The poster explained: "Ever since we found out [our] baby was going to be a boy, my husband and I have had his name chosen. My mother-in-law made subtle digs throughout pregnancy at how she's not a fan of the name and if we've considered anything else."

She dodged the question and changed the subject often as she didn't want to argue with her mother-in-law: "She can be very opinionated and stubborn," she explained.

But with the baby now a week old, she took to the internet to share her concerns.

"[The name is] not officially registered yet, but we have announced his name to friends, family and social media," she explained. "My mother-in-law has gone out of her way at every opportunity to make a comment on his name—even after a traumatic birth which landed me in theater."

The mother-in-law continued to share her upset—telling others how upset she was about the name.

"She's been talking to family behind our back saying how disappointed she is, as well as pulling my husband aside to privately ask if we would change the name," she wrote. "She is purposely avoiding saying his name, and has opted to calling him 'junior' instead."

In the post, the new mom also revealed that it wasn't just the first name her mother-in-law took issue with—she also disliked the middle name.

"My husband has two middle names—X and Y—and when we chose baby's name, we decided to use middle name Y. It is also my father's middle name too so it seemed very sentimental to us all," she said. "But my mother-in-law has kicked off big time, pulling out crocodile tears and directly asking my husband to change the middle name to something that tributes her family instead."

After many arguments over the name, the poster explained she was considering just adding in the middle name that her mother-in-law wanted to "keep the peace." The issue had now even started causing arguments between her and her husband.

"My number one rule of baby naming is never share the name before your baby is born," said Humphrey. "By waiting to announce your baby's name, you're saving yourself the hurt feelings, anger, and anxiety that come from loved ones' name insults. It's much more difficult for friends and family to share their negative opinion about a name once it's been given to a living, breathing child."

In hundreds of replies on the post, Mumsnet users overwhelmingly urged the new mom to stick to her guns and keep the baby name she wanted.

"Your child's names is your and your husband's choice, nobody else's," said one reply.

Another commenter said: "Stick to your guns, absolutely. Who does she think she is."

"Please register that baby's name before she wears you down. And tell your husband to remind her who she is. If he needs to give her a hint, she's not the baby's parent," wrote one Mumsnet user.

"In my opinion, there are very few cases in which parents should change a child's name," agreed Humphrey. "A name shapes who we are; so changing a name changes a person's identity."

Newsweek was not able to verify the details of the case.