Wife Praised Online for Shouting at Deaf Husband: 'You Did Nothing Wrong'

A woman, whose husband is partially deaf, has received a wave of support from users on Mumsnet after he allegedly went "mental" and "threatened to throw his bottle" at her head when she shouted at him to turn the television off.

In a post shared on the online forum, Mumsnet user Rosebel said she asked her husband to turn the television off while he was heading off to bed.

"He didn't hear me, so I admit I probably did shout at him asking him to turn off the TV.
He went f***ing mental, threatened to throw his bottle at my head as I was really p***ing him off and screamed in my face saying over and over not f***ing nice is it?," the user said.

Her exact words to her husband, who allegedly refuses to wear his hearing aid, were: "I said can you turn the TV off," and "that's why his reaction shocked me," the woman said.

The mother, who said she was exhausted and had been up since 4 a.m. with their toddler, told her husband that she was "sorry for shouting but it's annoying saying things multiple times."

She allegedly "got no apology" from her husband "for being screamed at or threatened," according to the post.

She said: "I know I started it by shouting first but I'm so upset that he can react like that...am I just being stupid to feel so upset? He was probably justified in his reaction and I can't see it as I'm dead tired."

Several other users on Mumsnet came to the original poster's defense, saying she "did nothing wrong" and that the husband's "aggressive and violent" behavior "wasn't justified."

MontanaMountains wrote: "Of course he wasn't justified in threatening you with a bottle!...Nobody should live like this, and no child should be exposed to this."

Clymene agreed, noting: "Your husband is aggressive and violent and this is no way to bring up children. Do you have a friend you can talk to? I can't believe people are saying he's justified. FFS."

User coffy11 said: "You did nothing wrong. Of course you're going to raise your voice if he can't hear you. It's his fault for not wearing the hearing aid. Completely unacceptable behavior from him and he needs to apologize to you."

MiniTheMinx said: "Nothing you did could justify someone threatening to throw a bottle at you."

BackToTheTop added: "I think his hearing is the least of your problems. He threatened you with violence and shouted in your face. Your annoyance at his lack of hearing is normal, his reaction was way way WAY out of proportion."

In a later comment, the original poster said: "I guess I was in the wrong and will just have to be more patient if he doesn't hear me (it's not as if he can help being partially deaf)," noting "shouting was never going to help. I'll apologize properly tomorrow."

User Howappropriate told the original poster: "Don't apologize! He crossed a line threatening violence! We've all raised our voices during annoying conversations when one person is in another room, [and] isn't paying full attention..."

Some were more understanding of the husband's hearing loss but condemned his reaction, which "went way too far," wrote Mwnci123.

"You were being a dick about his hearing, obviously, which in no [way] justifies his behaviour. You need to sort this shit-show out for yourselves and for your child," said Mwnci123, but noted the husband "went way too far screaming in your face and threatening to throw a bottle at you."

HeArInGhandsgirl11 agreed, saying: "Having hearing loss can be very isolating and frustrating. I think you should be more considerate...however his behavior is totally unacceptable."

Glitternails1 argued: "It's not his fault he's hard of hearing," while agreeing the husband needs to wear his hearing aid.

Glitternails1 added: "You probably yelled at him in an exasperated or aggressive tone which upset him (as it sounds you're p***ed off you had to repeat yourself)," to which Clymene replied: "Even if she used an exasperated tone, threatening to bottle her is not ever an acceptable response. Ever. FFS can we stop with the apologies for male violence?"

If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic violence, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) for help. See their website for more information.