Teen Stepdaughter Slammed for Letting Boyfriend Stay Over: 'Disrespectful'

A 17-year-old girl has drawn criticism online after defying her father and stepmother by having her boyfriend stay overnight.

The teen's parents previously banned him from staying over after the young couple defied house rules by sleeping together. But while the parents were keen on the couple sleeping in separate rooms, some felt they may be fighting the inevitable.

According to Planned Parenthood, the average age when people have sex for the first time is 18. Given that figure, it's hardly a surprise that the stepdaughter is seeking out opportunities to sleep with her boyfriend who is 18.

According to the stepmom, posting to Mumsnet under the handle ponamo8127, they initially let the boyfriend "stay over a few times if they had plans the next day which involved them getting up early." Although it was a rule that they "sleep in separate rooms." Most of the posts on Mumsnet come from the U.K. where the age of consent is 16.

That didn't work though, as the boyfriend often snuck into her room at night, which resulted in the parents stopping him from staying in the house altogether. However, the stepdaughter found a way around this by "getting back late" and bringing her boyfriend with her. "We told her he couldn't stay but she made the excuse it was late," the stepmom said.

In one recent instance, they ended up "in bed all day" as she was not in college that day and he is unemployed. Despite being angry at her stepdaughter's response, the stepmom said they are afraid of challenging her and her boyfriend "lives alone so she could quite possibly go and live with him which we don't want."

For many commenting on social media, the stepdaughter's actions were a clear breach of trust. Adultchildofelderlyparents said: "you are completely entitled to refuse entry to your home to anyone." Phisy adding: "If she can't be trusted, then take her key from her. She's disrespectful."

"I feel your frustration," Girlmeetsboy added. "My daughter has just got her first boyfriend, she's just 19. She met his Mum and stayed over the same night and has stayed there 3 nights since. I am not ok with this."

However, others felt the parents were ultimately fighting a losing battle. Knickerthief1 said: "You either accept the partner staying in her room or you accept she will leave and move out" while ZeroFuchsGiven commented: "If they want to have sex, they will regardless of where they are."

Those sentiments were echoed by Anita Cleare, parenting expert and author of The Working Parent's Survival Guide, who told Newsweek: "The important thing to remember is that if teenagers want to have sex, they will find a time and place to do it, regardless of parents' opinions. Most teen sexual encounters happen when parents are out of the house, often during the day."

Cleare said the key to traversing parental issues of this kind is communication.

"The most important thing parents of teenagers can do is to talk to their teens about sex," she said. "Talk not just about issues like consent and safe sex and delaying intercourse until they are ready but also about relationships—such as what constitutes a healthy romantic relationship and how to talk about how you feel and what you do (or do not) want to do."