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A woman has been called "ungrateful" for opening her Christmas presents and hating them all.
In a popular Mumsnet post shared by user Dawb, she explained finding a box from her favorite shop while cleaning the house. However, she was disappointed with the gifts and referred to them as "expensive tat."
She estimates her husband spent $180 on the goods but she is adamant she wouldn't "wear or use any of it."
"An easy, creative way to make sure gift preferences are considered, is for both of you to be each other's Santa and share your wish lists, by providing print-outs, magazine/article clippings, website screenshots, etc. of gifts you both would like to receive," Angela Wadley, dating mentor and author of 5 Minute Life Hacks for Busy Lifestyles, told Newsweek.
"It can still be exciting because neither of you would know exactly which of the items you will get from your wish list, but at least you know you both won't be disappointed. Since gift-giving can be both stressful and time-consuming, offering that as a suggestion can be mutually beneficial," she added.
Dawb described her partner as "far from romantic." She said: "He does try but I think due to his upbringing he is a bit of a robot. I feel so so mean telling him—'thanks for trying but what on earth were you thinking.' I'm also feeling a bit down that he really hasn't got a clue—and probably never will."
She highlighted he isn't "spontaneous" but he is "lovely," and her best friend would love a partner like him.
However, he has exceeded their agreed-upon $12 limit and splurged on items she dislikes. She also stated she is allergic to some of the gifts.
In the comments, the user said they are going on holiday for Christmas which is why they set a small budget for gifts.
She wrote: "We share finances and I earn much more. So I bought more of the holiday than him. He would be happy to stay at home but it was me that wanted to go abroad. I just hate financial waste."
Speaking to Newsweek, Wadley said: "If a woman opens her presents from her partner and does not like them, the first thing she should do is stop and breathe. Disappointment is not what she wished for, but if possible, do not immediately react and show how much you do not like the gifts.
"If she has never discussed gifts or her partner truly is not skilled in the gift-giving department (some people are not, even with the best of intentions), it would not really be fair to get upset with him. She does not have to pretend she is ecstatic, but anger will not help the situation and could truly be a perplexing response if her partner truly did not know she wouldn't like her gifts."
The expert advised commenting on how well the gifts are wrapped and expressing her appreciation for the effort to soften the "criticism blow."
Wadley told Newsweek: "She should make sure to pay attention to her partner for reactions to her comments. If her partner looks upset that she didn't like the gifts, she can assure him that she appreciates the thought and wait to address gift preferences, once things calm down a bit.
"[...] She needs to make sure she discusses it and not let it linger for too long, because it can cause resentment."
Have you had a similar Christmas dilemma? Let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice on relationships, family, friends, money, and work, and your story could be featured on Newsweek's "What Should I Do? section.
Over 331 people have responded to the post since it was published on December 3.
"Why is it expensive tat, just because it's not to your taste? Sorry but you just sound unbelievably [un]grateful. We all get gifts we don't like. Think of it another way, he's chosen, by the sounds of it, a number of gifts from a website he knows you like, weeks in advance. Most people on here will be moaning their partners didn't get them anything or got them some crud at the last minute," wrote one user.
Another said: "My DH [darling husband] usually thinks about starting his Christmas shopping at about 3 pm on Christmas Eve so I'm quite impressed with the level of organization tbh [to be honest]. I would just say nothing and pretend to like them on the day."
"He's been THAT organized? He has looked ahead and got you things before they go out of stock and ordered in plenty of time to dodge the postal strikes. You do sound rather ungrateful.... and cheeky too. You shouldn't have opened it! That's shabby behavior," wrote another.
Newsweek was not able to verify the details of the case.
Update 12/07/22, 5:57 a.m. ET: This article was updated to modify the summary.
About the writer
Lucy Notarantonio is Newsweek's Senior Lifestyle and Trends Reporter, based in Birmingham, UK. Her focus is trending stories and human ... Read more