Woman Who Had Nose Job After Fiancé's 'Beak' Remark Urged To Cancel Wedding

A woman who had a nose job ahead of her wedding has asked for advice, after admitting she no longer recognizes herself anymore.

The bride-to-be shared her dilemma to Reddit, under the username u/ThrowRA_nopicspls, as she revealed her in-laws "never held back" when making jokes about her nose.

A nose job, aka rhinoplasty, is the most popular cosmetic surgical procedure in America, with figures from the American Society of Plastic Surgeons 2020 report showing 352,555 were carried out that year. That figure was down 3 per cent from the year before.

"My fiancé said he knew they really loved me the moment they started with the jokes, they're the kind of family that loves to make fun of each other," she wrote.

She claimed she inherited the nose from her dad, who's Jewish, and has "tried to not be sensitive about it."

But a comment from her fiancé hit home, as she admitted: "He basically said he was so lucky for my nose because it was the only way he had a chance with me.

"That comment stayed in my head since, the idea that I'd actually be beautiful if it wasn't for my nose. I've had really bad self-esteem and would go in and out of believing I'm ugly."

After they got engaged, she thought about a rhinoplasty, and decided to get it done before the wedding, which her fiancé approved of—a little too much.

"He was really supportive of the idea and excited for it. He made some comments about being glad I was losing 'the beak,' something he'd never expressed before I suggested it, which confirmed to me that I needed it," she added.

But after going through the procedure she disliked her new nose, although her fiancé loves it.

Certified Aesthetic Consultant coach Michele Garber told Newsweek: "One should never have plastic surgery to please someone else. If you are not happy about your life—plastic surgery is not the answer. Love yourself first.

"Unfortunately, it is a common experience after a nose job to have a difficult time accepting the new look. It takes time.

"Some patients feel they look so different that it's difficult to look in the mirror. Rhinoplasty does change your appearance. It's important to get the proper counseling before any plastic surgery procedure."

The bride-to-be continued: "I hate it so much. I feel like I'm staring at someone else's face, I look like any other woman in the world besides myself…

"My fiancé is really frustrated with me, he thinks I 'objectively' look better and I need to get used to it."

When her future husband quizzed her over their wedding photos, she suggested wearing her veil, a scarf or even a face mask.

That didn't go down well, as he claimed her "selfishness was going to get in the way of us having a happy wedding."

She continued: "He said if I do any of that we might as well not get married at all. That hurt a lot.

"I can't stand to see myself in pictures like this and having everybody see my nose the whole day would make this even worse for me.

"I'm already going to be blaming myself for the fact that I won't have MY nose in pictures."

Garber, founder of the NipTuck Coach, warned against having rhinoplasty close to a big event, saying: "Never plan a plastic surgery procedure close to a big event, especially a wedding. Healing can take up to a year.

"You never know how you will feel, and complications can happen. What if you aren't happy with your results? Realistically have your surgery 10-12 months before a big event."

The post has amassed more than 10,000 upvotes, with commenters urging the poster to reconsider the engagement.

Zoenne asked: "Also consider this: how would you feel OP if you have children and they inherit your / your father's nose? How do you think your partner and [his] family will treat those children?"

The top comment, from Glittering-Eagle-654, amassed more than 26,000 upvotes: "Honey, no. As a woman with Jewish heritage myself, there was nothing wrong with your nose. However, there is something wrong with the man who is supposed to be the love of your life insulting—and allowing his family to insult—the literal face you were born with."

Kr0mb0pulos_michael commented: "The fact that he bullied her into getting SURGERY… just yuck."

Theladythunderfunk added: "Oh, honey. The problem was never your nose. It was always the man. You don't need him, you need to love yourself."

In an edit, the bride said: "I'm trying to look into getting another nose job to reverse this but I don't know if any plastic surgeon would be willing/able to give me 'the beak' back, and I'm terrified of getting surgery again. I just want to feel comfortable in my skin again.

"As much as I know logically I should be able to get used to this over time, I really don't feel I can. Everybody is suggesting we should postpone the wedding, and I think that makes a lot of sense.

"I don't know how my fiancé is going to feel about that. I love him but a lot of these comments are making me think more deeply into how he treats me."

Garber said: "Revision rhinoplasty surgery is complicated. It's important to manage your expectations and be realistic.

"Once you have rhinoplasty your nose will never look like your old nose but a revision may tweak it to where you will like it better."

Newsweek reached out to u/ThrowRA_nopicspls for comment. We could not verify the details of the case.